Are you too busy?

Have you ever seen the acronym for being too busy? I will never forget the first time I saw it. I was working full-time as a guidance counselor at the Teenage Parenting Center here in Columbus, and I was on my way to take my two children, ages 3 and an infant, to Daycare. As I sped past St. Mark United Methodist Church, and there it was, on their billboard.

Buried
Under
Satan's
Yoke

Being too busy is the one thing that sneaks up on me EVERY SINGLE TIME I get close to reaching my goal of becoming more like Mary, sister of Lazarus.

When I saw that billboard seven years ago, I was involved in a ladies Bible study with a group of young mothers. None of them worked outside the home; and I joined them because as a working mother, especially in a school setting, I was literally starved for interaction with other mothers of preschoolers. The first night I met with them, God gave me the desire to become like them... stay-at-home Moms. It was difficult, but with God's help we managed to get there within about 9 months.

I have now been at home for 6 years. Occasionally, I have worked part-time; but I have mostly been at home taking care of my 3 boys and my husband. One might think it would be easy to sit at the feet of Jesus like Mary when you have no place to be other than the parent-pick-up line at school. Not so... at least, not so for me!

Why not? What exactly do I do all day, you may be thinking? My distractions have varied over these 6 years. Play group; Bible Study; volunteering at the Crisis Pregnancy Center; being room Mom and/or team Mom; teaching Teamkid, Sunday School, and/or AWANA; teaching and/or organizing VBS; being cub scout den leader; driving kids all over town; exercising; and working part-time. Not to mention cooking, shopping, cleaning, and visiting (when possible) my grandparents who all died during the last 7 years.

All of these things were good; and to some extent, I enjoyed doing them all. At the same time, all of these "good" activities combined have buried me alive... choked the true life out of me. The only thing I wish I had done more is visit my grandparents. Everything else distracted me, and knowing I allowed it to happen adds to my sorrow now.

This school year, God has really been convicting me to guard my time more carefully. Naming this blog "Becoming a Mary" helped as I sifted through the many needs in my family's church, school, and community. For example, I felt drawn to respond to a need for counselors at the Crisis Pregnancy Center. As I prayed about it, God gently said, "Yes, it is an important ministry. But because of your children, it's not exactly what I had in mind for you in becoming more like Mary." Ouch.

So... I am trying to forget the guilt I feel over ministries in need and just obey God. My ministries at church this year require no preparation (kids' church and nursery, each about once a month). My ministries as school require a little more: cub scout den leader and room mother... but isn't that what Jesus did? Put his greatest efforts into reaching the world? I'll do a Bible study, ofcourse. Beth Moore's Daniel, and I can't wait! I also signed up to help Morningside implement it's new mission. I want to start walking, and hope to get back to a healthier weight. Despite all of these things, I know some will say I'm not doing much... but I don't answer to man, other than my husband, who supports me doing even less than I am. I answer only to Christ... and He wants me to become more like Mary...

Changing from a Martha to a Mary

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord's feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!" "Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken from her." Luke 10:38-41

God has been calling me to begin a blog for some time now. I have ignored and resisted His urgings, however; because this is a very busy season in my life. First and foremost in my heart and mind is the important task God assigned me in raising three men. Can there be a more important calling? I think not. Even so, I know God has also assigned me another task equally important; rather, more important because it is a necessary part of raising three men correctly. God has called me to become more like Mary, the sister of Lazarus and Martha.

I have been like Martha, not Mary, my entire life. I have always been very, very busy. Years ago, God gave me the verse, "Be still and know that I am God..." Sadly, I have never gotten the hang of being still and really knowing God like I should. I have always remained busy, busy, busy. I really want to change, and I believe I will change now because becoming a Mary instead of a Martha is (for the first time) the true desire of my heart.